Bmom and 1 month old

So today I decided to try and call C and see if maybe this week she'd like to meet for coffee and visit so she can see Jaxon again. We think about her so much and now more than ever we really feel like open adoption is the route for us. So scary how things change so quickly. Seems like yesterday when we were attending our 2 day seminar and both Dan and I thinking that the most we'd ever be comfortable with was letters and pictures maybe once a year. That has totally changed since meeting C. She's so amazing. For those who didnt know, we did meet with her and her daughter D at our agency and it was wonderful. She was just as happy to see us as we were to see her. I had a total breakdown moment last sunday when I was watching this Lifetime movie "16 and Pregnant". I didnt get to watch the whole thing but caught bits and pieces of it and it turned out to be an adoption story. In the midst of the tears flowing while watching the end of this show, I had a moment and I know it had to have been God telling me in a subtle way, that this is all ok. Open adoption is for us. There should be no worries. This gal had chosen an adoptive family to parent her child...and at the end of the movie...the adoptive father had a video camera and was taping this little boy and as I watched, it was like i was jumping ahead in time 5 years and seeing Jaxon. The adoptive couple had just had a baby girl..and the father asked the little boy-- (as I remember it)

Boy: My name is Charlie...
Father: WHats new in your life?
Boy: I'm going to be in kindergarden....
Father: Anything else new going on?
Boy: I have a new baby sister? (he walks towards his mother sitting on couch with baby sister)
Father: Oh yeah? And where did she come from?
Boy: She came from my mommies tummy.
Father: Really...well where did you come from?
Boy: I came from Jacey's tummy.
Father: Oh? And who is Jacey? (little boy walks to other side of the room where Jacey is sitting)
Boy: She is my birthmother. (and then he whispers something to the affect)...and I'm the only one who knows how much she really loves me.

Since seeing this show I have found myself wanting to hit send on the cell phone where C's name was. After talking with Dan, we are ready to open things up and let C and D into our lives. In our very first meeting with her, we had even discussed attending birthday parties of the kids' but I really see more. We know in the long run, this will be what is best for Jaxon. I frequent (or as often as I can now being a mama) an adoption forum in which I've met several amazing women who are part of this triad and I've got some wonderful advice and have had very meaningful conversations with them and it seems like there is some common ground with all of us involved is that there may be people in our lives who are outside of the triad that may find it difficult to understand or to accept open adoption and the importance it has in the adopted childs life. Closed adoptions are a thing of the past and now days more and more adoptive parents are pulling out all stops and are going with what their heart is telling them...do what is right for your child. You just need to hope and pray that those in your life close to you will grow to understand and accept such a special situation. Today I called C. I got her voice mail, but I left her a message telling her we've been thinking about her a lot and want to grab coffee this week if her schedule allows...and that we love her and hope to see her soon.
In conclusion...before I go get a little snooze in before I pull an all nighter with the lil man, today we celebrate 1 month with our beautiful son :o) We couldnt be more happy or more blessed by this special boy and I thank God for making my life complete. Here are a few shots I took for his one month.